Emergency Call List

Hey Everybody. The race season is upon us and before we get going I'd like to review something that appears not to be obvious for everyone out there.

If you come across me in the woods during an adventure race and I'm on the ground not breathing please call the following people in this order:

1.) 911
2.) 911 again (If we're in Philadelphia)
3.) Mary Kate Olsen (She's cute and all but how stupid do you have to be to think she's the first contact in a medical emergency?)
4.) Baby Nanny
5.) Baby Momma (She'll start talking doctor talk and confuse most of you so she's last)

Thanks.

On my race front I'm looking forward to a little Swamp Stomping over President's Day weekend. Followed a few weeks later by the Snowgaine March 1st and 2nd. Speaking of which: how about some of those southern AR studs we visit every winter returning the favor and take on some carpet bagging Yankees in a more nordic setting for once?